| e/c | Ithaca Mafia Dot Com: MMVI.

Thursday, February 26, 2004
Hay-Zeus The Eskimo

First, he was Johnny Damon, "Eskimo."

Last Year, he was Johnny "Super Disco" Damon, Rockstar.

Now, he is Johnny "Jesus" Damon, or as I like to call him: JD Superstar.

God, I love baseball!

// posted by Kevin @ 2:01 PM (0) comments

Tuesday, February 24, 2004
Justice!

So, probably about a year to a year and a half ago, I read an article about how there was a class action lawsuit against the music industry for unfair price-fixing of CD's over the past 15 years or so... 43 different states were banding together to try and get the companies to change their illegal ways of "Compact Disc Minimum Advertised Pricing" and obtain a nice hefty settlement to help pay us back for years of abuse in charging almost $20 for a friggin' cd. (I mean, I figure during that time, I purchased probably anywhere from 250-400 CD's. You do the math.)

And lo, I had pretty much forgotten about how after reading that article a year and a half ago, I signed up to become part of said class action lawsuit -- thereby entitling me to whatever settlement should come about if the case was found in the Plantiff's favor.

And lo lo, I was quite surprised to open my mailbox today to find a little envelope from the CD MAP Antitrust Litigation entitled "IMPORTANT: Settlement Materials Enclosed" waiting for me. Today, it would seem that justice has finally be served! The little man, has finally scored a victory over the giant corporations and their years of abuse and exploitation!!! And what, you might ask -- is this justice worth?

Thirteen dollars and eighty-six cents.

Not even enough to buy a goddamned CD. Viva las Justice!

// posted by Kevin @ 11:22 AM (0) comments

Sunday, February 22, 2004
Don't Drink The Water

Whew. It took me a helluva lot longer than I had anticipated, but I finally got the 3rd Annual SpaHa Semi-Formal pics up... Resizing almost 50 pictures to managable sizes ain't as easy as it used to be, I'll tell you what -- but they are now up for everyone to peruse and enjoy on the picture pages. As Frants mentioned, it was a grand party, and there was (as usual) much dancing and drinking and ham. Delicious ham...

I'd also like to congratulate Reed on his first update to the site. I can't say I'm positive, but I think it had something to do w/ A-Rod and the an announcement concerning the Yankees... And so, what then have I been doing with myself these days post-Ed? Post-Employment?? Well, first we had the big CD collection re-organization/re-catalogue of 2004. And with around seven hundred albums, why let me tell you -- that is no easy feat! So, I made sure to pace out that project over the course of the first two weeks, and balance it with other things to occupy my time... Like going to the Gym, for exemplor. And to get inspirado for when I go to the gym, I studied hours and hours of OZ episodes on HBO On Demand (I mean, I should be so lucky to end up looking like Adebisi, Chucky Pancamo, or Hoyt... Minus the tats and rape, of course). I made chili. I saw movies. I saw concerts (Ben Harper -- who RULED, and BNL -- who was everything to everyone).

But most of all, I killed people all over North America.

That's right, I sought out and hunted down everyone from a 13-year-old kid to a 43-year-old father of three. And you know what? I loved it. I'd do it again. In fact, I'm planning on doing it in a few minutes. What am I talking about, of course? I can't really be killing all these people, right? I am talking about the most time-consuming invention I have come across in ages -- the Network adapter for the Playstation 2, and a little game called SOCOM II: Navy Seals.

You see, I just start up my Playstation, and woila -- it is connected to the internet where I may take the guise of a Seal or Terrorist and use a huge arsenal of weaponry at my disposal to run around and fight with other people. Even Diesel and Duck upstairs. AND we all get to talk to each other at the same time. Nothing is more embarrassing when you get your ass blown up by a hand grenade some guy threw right into your hiding space, and you hear yourself getting admonished by a 9-year old kid named "MASTaKiLLa_187".

But then again, nothing is quite as thrilling as returning the favor.

Sure, it's the height of geekiness. It doesn't make us cooler, or help us with the ladies. But we're unemployed, and BOY does it kill some time.

At least until baseball begins. 42 days till' Opening Day. Life is good (for havin' no job).

// posted by Kevin @ 5:16 PM (0) comments

Tuesday, February 17, 2004
Umm... yeah.

// posted by Kevin @ 7:48 AM (0) comments

Sunday, February 15, 2004
Oh my God!!! Yes, oh my God!!!

If you've never had the pleasure of seeing a dancing Sperm, I want you to imagine. Imagine a rather large man, garnished with a perennial goatee, deceptively long hair, oversize pajama bottoms and a nice fitting tee. Imagine him standing in the middle of his living room. Three large windows expose him to all of downtown NYC. Imagine him staring at his TV. Mouth agape. He stares some more. His mouth then slowly but organically breaks into what you could only describe as 'the widest smile you may have ever seen.' And then he slowly he starts to move. Like most things it starts in the hips. Side to side. Building. Then the movement just takes over. The legs. The arms. The feet. And a wild shake of the deceptively long hair. The movement has overtaken him. And then comes the sound. It bellows up from deep within his loins. And juts forth to meet the rhythm of his movements. It's a little diddy first spoken by the great Reverend Brown in the classic movie "Coming to America."

"Oh, my Gawd! Yes! Oh, my Gawd! -- Oh, my Gawd! Yes, oh my God!"

And if you're wondering why. Why a man called Sperm would awake on a Sunday morning, the day after Valentine's Day, to dance in the middle of his living room for all the world to see?

Is it because of sex? No, but certainly feels that way.

Is it because of money? No, but it certainly feels that way.

Is it because of power? No, but he expects to see lots of power soon enough.

It is simply because of a man. A man who woke up one morning, not unlike Sperm did today. A man who woke up one morning a made a decision. A man who woke up one morning, one fateful morning, a few weeks ago and made a decision. A decision to play basketball. Just a simple game a basketball with his friends. Just a simple game of basketball with his friends, that would soon make all the difference in the world to a rather large man, with a perennial goatee, staring at his television.

So, here's to you, Aaron Boone, we raise your twisted knee in pre-season triumph!!!

// posted by Kevin @ 9:46 AM (0) comments

Sunday, February 08, 2004
Post Semi-Formal

After a splendid time in Spanish Harlem, free of gunplay and rioting, what else is there to look forward to?

Worry not, friends. It's only February, and there's plenty more excuses for parties to come. Hell, the Oscars are only a few weeks away (though sadly, the Film Fop will not be holding his usual Oscar party. He will be in LA, trying to crash the after-parties).

Mafia in da hizz-ouse, Jude Law. Ithaca is gorges, Mr. Weinstein.

Man, I love being able to update the page for no reason whatsoever other than I can.

frants

// posted by Kevin @ 8:36 AM (0) comments

Thursday, February 26, 2004 Hay-Zeus The Eskimo

Tuesday, February 24, 2004 Justice!

Sunday, February 22, 2004 Don't Drink The Water

Tuesday, February 17, 2004 Umm... yeah.